I have been fascinated with this LOGO TV reality show hosted by comedian Alec Mapa and starring transgender performer, Calpernia Addams. I find it so interesting to see these straight guys vying for Calpernia's love and affection. I mean, I get that she is a woman and they are men, so what's so fascinating about that, but come on....it is pretty riveting stuff. Especially now that pre-op transgender contestant, Jim, has told Calpernia that there is no junk in the front of his truck and she decides to keep him there. I mean, she is a straight woman, so wouldn't she be attracted to a man, with all his parts? I know this is coming out of some ignorance on my part, but just trying to understand.
It was wonderful to see Jim's parents not only embrace their transgender son, but Calpernia also. Every transgender person should be so lucky to have parents like Jim's.
Check it out on LOGO.
3 comments:
I can't speak for Calpernia but I can hazard a guess as to what's going on with Jim's junk and Calpernia's (apparent) view of it as a non-issue. I'm pretty sure it boils down to that Calpernia undoubtedly knows about what's involved in "phalloplasty" (her BFF maintains arguably the largest and best transgender information resource on the internet, tsroadmap, remember) and as such knew all along that Jim's equipment is going to be, well, ok...
You can try looking this stuff up if you're morbidly curious, but I warn you there are not work-safe pictures ahoy, to say the least. But basically while Vaginoplasty is generally extremely effective and shockingly close to the "real thing", creating male bits is much harder and less effective. There are a couple of different procedures, but one of the more popular ones basically involves peeling off leg skin, rolling it up, and attaching it to the crotch in so many words. No procedure really allows for erections or ejaculations or any of that. If I'm not mistaken, certain parts of the female anatomy respond to testosterone in a way that they do this, but as you can imagine there are some size issues there. So besides the hideous cost (as Jim mentioned, it runs around $100k a least; you can get a neovagina at one of the best surgeons in the world and a fun trip to Thailand for $20k or less, or domestically for roughly $50k or less) it's just really not THAT effective. Sadly one of the "best" reasons to get it is because getting genital surgery is required by many legal procedures that require a gender marker. We'd be better off with removing gender from government records or at least, cutting way down on some of these procedures which are far too strict (good luck getting a passport with your real gender on it if you're trans) but that's another rant entirely.
So, hopefully I wasn't too gory, but the point is Calpernia HAS to know that Jim's surgical options are sadly sub-par compared to hers. Many FtMs never plan to get it, opting to wait to see if something better comes along or manage to be happy/come to terms with the effects testosterone has on their organs. Often they use prosthetics that were designed for men who have sustained damage to their parts for one or another reason.
So, since she has known he is FtM and has kept him around for quite some time now, it either doesn't bother her, doesn't bother her enough to find reasons to eliminate him, or she's simply afraid of looking like a hypocrite. It's really hard for me to say, personally, what I'd do in that situation since I like girls, and if I was dating a transwoman who hasn't had reassignment surgery, I'd be happy and encouraging for her to get it if that was an objective of hers. :) But if I WAS interested in male bits that way, I could probably be OK with the lack of natural ones since that opens up a lot more room for playing with prosthetics and toys and it might be more fun with the right state of mind!
Calpernia's turn ons and offs in the bedroom are a secret to her and those whom she shares her bedroom with, but the conclusion is that unless she is pulling some kind of affirmative action stunt, Jim's equipment just doesn't bother her that much if at all.
Keep in mind, it's not unusual for those unfamiliar with what goes with being transgendered to fixate on genital reassignment (which has sadly led to practically classifying trans people as "pre-op" and "post-op" which is terrible for a number of reasons) but if you honestly think about what percent of your life you are using your genitals, and what even smaller percent you are using them socially, you can kind of see that there is far more to filling a new gender role than just what's between your legs. :) Jim is a great example for this--I assume you, like me, see him as completely male and would cringe at referring to him as "her". Yet, Jim doesn't have a penis. As you can see, it just doesn't matter for 97% of life :)
Great feedback! Thanks so much for your insight. You are welcome back anytime.
This is a very engaging show. I've only been able to see a couple of episodes. Wish I could "on demand" the whole season.
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